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Judith Haire - Blog

Guest Post by Mike Skinner: Trauma, Abuse and Mental Health

Hello folks,

Greetings to all…I am glad to be back and so grateful that Judith has asked me to write and share some things about myself and allowing me some flexibility with what I post.

 I am mindful that this blog does some wonderful things in helping to raise awareness and highlight helpful ways and information for healing that pertains to the issues of trauma, abuse and mental health concerns and that will indeed be a part of this post. But….given the fact that Judith resides in the United Kingdom and I would imagine a lot of her readers are over there also, I thought a neat thing to write about would be the time I lived in England while touring all of Great Britain as a drummer with the hard rock band, “American Train.”

Music has always been a life-saver for me in so many respects, and I don’t say that lightly. It helped to bring me joy and some semblance of relief as a child and a teenager while growing up in a home that found me being subjugated to all kinds of horrific abuse [sexual, physical, emotional, and neglect] at the hands of both of my parents and some of their equally perverted friends. When I learned how to expand my musical ‘vocabulary’ by learning to play the drums, well that too helped me in so many ways in keeping me sane and healthy despite the cruelty I was experiencing.My drumming abilities came about with a lot of hard work and practice and this enabled me to start performing professionally at the ripe old age of twelve years old by playing at parties, teen centers and junior high dances with the local rock band, “Resistance.” 

By the time I graduated from high school I was playing professionally in all kinds of venues that included rock clubs, outdoor shows and concerts and so much more – I was living the dream of a lifetime.Please know that my introduction to the hopes and dreams of being in the music business came from one of the most profound life-changing experiences in my life – “The Beatles”. When I saw them on the Ed Sullivan Show, I knew from that point on what I would do with my life; even though I was only nine years old. I would become a professional musician.I cannot convey the excitement I felt when given the opportunity to live and tour Great Britain back in January 1976….this was indeed a dream of a lifetime and it did bring about the thoughts and feelings of “pinch me I’m dreaming”. And to live in Liverpool, England, the home of my heroes, “The Beatles”, well, let’s just say that my happiness meter was off the charts.What was originally thought to be a three month tour ended up being two wonderful years of non-stop touring all over Great Britain. We got to perform in many of the same places as did the Beatles, Deep Purple, Led Zeppelin, Black Sabbath, Nazareth, The Stones and so many other great bands. Back then we were also playing in many of the same venues as AC/DC.....it was a lot of fun and the experience of a lifetime!!!

You can learn more about these times and my musical journey by visiting my website – http://www.mskinnermusic.comThere are several articles you can read that go into more depth in regards to my musical endeavors and how it also applies to my advocacy work. I do have some pictures posted of me from back then and you can see some more by visiting Tom Howes’ website which is linked from mine in the Music Section. Tom was an incredible guitar player and musician - he also was in a band with Brad Whitford of Aerosmith. So there's lots of cool stuff to see and hear at his website. Sadly, he passed away several years ago due to some health problems but I will always be thankful for the time I got to work with him – I also owe him a deep amount of gratitude because he was the first person to encourage me to sing and to write songs. This was huge for me due to my lack of self-esteem from my childhood experiences.Perhaps the most significant piece to all of this and how it applies to healing was the simple fact of my being over there gave me the ability to feel safe – I had a whole ocean separating me from those who had hurt me. This was indeed the first time in my life that I ever felt safe and this gave me the ability to set about on my musical endeavors and my healing journey.  Safety is so important for all of us if we are to heal from that which has hurt us

.Take care, Mike

ps. Please do visit the Surviving Spirit to help you in your own healing odyssey. This is the nonprofit I have created to help those impacted by trauma, abuse and mental health concerns through the Creative Arts, Advocacy and Education  http://www.survivingspirit.com   
 

9 Comments to Guest Post by Mike Skinner: Trauma, Abuse and Mental Health:

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judith haire on Monday, February 06, 2012 10:51 AM
Many thanks Mike
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Paul Davidson on Tuesday, February 07, 2012 2:44 PM
Hi Judith it's so good to read Mikes so inspirational story here Hi Mike if your looking in. Im a bit of a heavy rock fan myself. I was even a Rodie for (Geordie) my local rock band a sertain Brian was their lead singer just before I joined them 1980 as he famously joined A.D.C.D. For those about to Rock Mike, I Salute ''YOU'' Mike did you ever come to Newcastle to the Bridge Hotel ? it was a small pub at the end of the High Level Bridge. Iknow A.C.D.C. Played there around the time you were in England. My brother talked me out of going in that night a huge mistake for me. Mike fancy contactingthem to do a charity gig for the globalgenesproject.org So you can reallyrock the world. ''FIRE''
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Mike Skinner on Wednesday, February 15, 2012 9:35 PM
Hi Paul, Donnie, Margie, Lynn, Judith, Mary Ann, We played all over the UK - one-nighters [and many matinee gigs also!!!] in colleges, universities, rock clubs, pubs, outdoor shows, "working men's clubs", etc, etc - you name it, if they wanted a hard rock band - we were there. So yes, we did play in Newcastle many times & loved it. Someday I hope to go back over there!!!! Thank you everyone for your kind and caring words. take care, Mike


Mary Ann Goughler on Tuesday, February 07, 2012 9:18 PM
Very nice "real" story Mike. I'm glad you got to feel safe, I know exactly what you mean. You are a good man Mr. Michael Skinner...keep on doing what you do best....
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Donnie on Thursday, February 09, 2012 10:10 PM
Mike Skinner, your story gives me inspiration. I also know that music gives spirit to the soul. I too am a survivor. I only listened to music back then. I hope to be able to play an instrument in the near future. Thanks
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Lynn Tolson on Thursday, February 09, 2012 11:24 PM
Mike, thanks for sharing your story. Your background in music is interesting, and a journey in itself. I hadn't realized you spent a full 2 years overseas. Cheers, Lynn
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Margie McKinnon on Saturday, February 11, 2012 2:12 AM
Hey Mike, What a great trip to take with you down memory lane. I was able to catch a glimpse of what your childhood was like and to see the joy of becoming a musical artist must have been an amazing thing. I could so relate to your being an ocean away from your perpetrators and the feeling of being safe. May you experience only safety and success throughout the rest of your lifetime. Thank you so much for all the good you are doing with your truly beautiful (and I have a cd to prove it) music. Hugs and love from one of your biggest fans. Margie
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Margie McKinnon on Saturday, February 11, 2012 2:16 AM
Hey Mike, Thanks so much for sharing a trip down memory lane. I am so grateful that you had your music to dull somewhat the pain of your abuse. I can totally relate with your comment about feeling safe by being an ocean away. Thank you for all the good work you are doing with your music. I can attest to your wonderful talent as I have a cd to prove it. May the rest of your life be filled with success and peace in all you do. Hugs from one of your biggest fans, Margie
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Margie McKinnon on Saturday, February 11, 2012 2:17 AM
Hey Mike, Thanks so much for sharing a trip down memory lane. I am so grateful that you had your music to dull somewhat the pain of your abuse. I can totally relate with your comment about feeling safe by being an ocean away. Thank you for all the good work you are doing with your music. I can attest to your wonderful talent as I have a cd to prove it. May the rest of your life be filled with success and peace in all you do. Hugs from one of your biggest fans, Margie
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